Feels great to actually be part of a movement. Now, I am actually in the game, it feels.
Here’s my new spot:
When asked, “how’s this?” — I had to say that “This is the worst possible placement for me!!!”
But, I followed that statement up with “Last Year”. As of now, I could care less about having my back to the room. In an otherwise safe location, I do not have the fear of my rear facing the crowd. I don’t have worry that someone will be mocking, causing problems, or otherwise having ill intentions. I have the confidence to not care anymore — and this is a huge milestone for me.
I have no fear of being watched. Matter of fact, I expect to be watched now. I expect to be used as an example of what to do, instead of what not to do. And even if my example is momentarily poor at any random moment, my overall gameplan is sound and secure within my confidence and the fear of having my back-to-a-crowd is gone because of that integrity.
It feels great to own a spot in the growing empire that surrounds me. I can tell that there are great things happening here and that is not JUST because I am here and excited. The thrill is heightened by the hive-like atmosphere, and I can now feel more like I am at work, instead of visiting the center where work is done. I now have 24/7 access, a key to my share-space, and a code to the front door. I am no-longer just a visitor. I am now a dedicated worker with desk space to prove my dedication to my craft.
Now, I know that this is an item that I can barely afford, luckily, by my sponser. That I am pushing the limits of my funding, even with this small upgrade. But I have no lack of faith in turning this small start into an empire. This small upgrade allows me more freedom to work well into the night if I deem the action appropriate.
My mobile life has just gotten even more mobile, not less. For now, I have a location to store several object that I must daily tote to and fro my mobile house. Now I am ready to go at any whim of my desire, for I do not have to pack the car each time. I am set to leave if I wish, to leave more room within the walls of my van. So that now, I can stretch more widely in my space and not feel the pressure of my work staring back at me — As/if I can actually take my mind off of work in the first place!
6:31 pm, Tuesday, 4.3.2018