Hopefully she’ll call

Just got a text for a Pet Healing.

Responded with a request for her to call.

Waited a few minutes & called with no answer. The number says Ohio, but mine says Savannah; that doesn’t mean much in Denver, a melting pot.

Maybe she’ll be a serious customer and return a call.

Maybe a lawncare customer will call.

Living on the cusp of depression is horrible. The difficulty for me seems to be MONEY.

But hey that’s normal right.

I live in a $500 value truck with a business partner. The truck has no windshield wipers. Well it does, and it has newly purchased motors, but the entire bracing for the wipers is shot.

I could have raked in thousands in Savannah by the way the calls came in, while I starve myself, bore myself, and live in self pity here in Denver while I burn all my cash on food, gas, and cannabis for two people.

**lady texted again. Looking for a pet sitter basically…welp back to depression**

All the while struggling against the monopoly of larger corporations that advertise for undercut prices (lol right, complaining about undercutting on undercutsyou.com!!! The irony!).

It is a struggle, a hell of a struggle and it is depressing even more to be on the verge of losing the only long-term investment in this crappy society that I own. That damned house that has been on the verge of loss since I was laid off from Gulfstream years ago…was that 2013? I dunno.

Everything in my life is different except for that stupid house. Everything is gone except that and the Dominion playing cards. That’s pretty much it.

Still have family & they have their same stuff plus more, but I have all new stuff…barely anything beyond tools and that stupid house where stupid people live. I don’t even have attachment to the tenant anymore beyond rent collection.

The start of my spiritual journey of 2017 was to pass on my house to rent to another lady (and family) going through a True Shamanic Awakening with full-blown “schizophrenia”. Through the use of overlapping principles and theories, I analyzed her situation & discovered amazing insight. This insight has led to my very accurate Color Theory.

**One guy plans to come to the Shamanic Healing Meetup Group at 3:33, 1 hr away.**

I am grateful for their support in my endeavors, but when their spiritual journey ended by imprisonment & acceptance of pharmaceutical treatment, my connection to them became lost.

At this point, our web is so broken that I don’t even really care about their welfare. Only mine for losing the house finally. I have already cut my emotional ties long ago…December 2018, I think it was.

I have cut ties so many times now that it is pretty simple. Yet devastating each time for a moment. I say it gets easier while I shield my left forehead in case tears decide to stream. Ooop too late. Just the thought of it brings me down because I have so little to lose.

Okay, time to cheer up. Dude is gonna be here 30 minutes early, in 15 minutes.

2:40pm, Sunday, 6.23.2019

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